I did it, I finally cut myself, again. At least this time I used a knife. Only this time there was no instant gratification that I could feel another emotion, it was just pain...so I'm not going to do it again. Wasn't that great. I remember the feeling of euphoria when I first started years ago, now, I feel cheated. I feel like I've done something bad and am going to be punished for it. But by who and how I don't know.
All I have to do now is wait and see how mum reacts, maybe that's what this whole thing is about, the shock factor? Seeing how far I will go, but seeing as how I don't really feel like doing it again, I guess not. I just need an outlet and this isn't the way for me.
Till Next Time....
No comments:
Post a Comment