New growth

It seems that my avoidance of the issues aren't helping still. I should've just been honest with John and perhaps I could've been over all this by now. But I'm not.I'm falling further and further behind and I'm slowly getting worse and worse with my temper and my frustration in everyday things. I've sought help though. I've taken the first step and asked for the help that I need.

After talking with the doctor it's really come to light that my fear of loosing mum could be the core of all my problems. Most people have already gone through the separation from their parents by 18-19 some by 20. But I'm now 23 and I've barely even begun. So new month, one step at a time process I'm going to achieve it. I'm going to make this a permanent and workable process that won't cause me too much anxiety along the way. Saying that, just thinking about it is making my heart race and my fears start to bubble up from my stomach.

Will wants him and I to have a healthy adult relationship when he gets here, but he knows that's not going to happen unless I make the move myself. So I have to, for the benefit of my own life and my relationship I need to work this out. I need this.

Till Next Time...

xx